How to Reconnect With Your Partner After Having Kids

When a couple has children, life can suddenly become so hectic that, inevitably, those warm and fuzzy feelings that first created the bond start to dissipate. Before, when it was just the two of you, it must have seemed so easy to reconnect and focus on the relationship. But now, with your little ones taking up so much time and energy, it can be a real challenge to set aside time and make your partnership a priority. If you’re feeling like something is missing in your relationship, you and your partner are certainly not alone. The good news is that with a little bit of effort, you can absolutely reconnect and strengthen your bond.

Why Reconnecting After Having Kids is so Important
Reconnecting with your partner after having kids is so important for many reasons. Here are some of the key benefits:

• A strong relationship between parents creates a stable, secure environment for kids.
• You and your partner can serve as great role models for your children, showing them the importance of communication, compromise, equity, and support.
• Prioritizing your relationship can help you recharge and gain balance in your life.
• It allows you to keep the spark alive in your marriage.

Taking Time to Reconnect
Taking time to reconnect with your partner after having kids may seem like a daunting task, but with the right strategies, it can be a lot easier than you think. Here are some tips to get started:

  1. Get Creative with Date Nights
    It’s critical that couples find a way to break away from family life and venture outside the home. Weekly date nights are a great way to make sure that you maintain your identity not just as parents, but as a couple. Of course it can be a little tough to carve out time when you have kids, so getting creative with time-saving methods can be really helpful. For example, instead of going out for an entire evening, why not try a lunch date or even a morning date? Other ideas include having an in-home movie night or a picnic in the backyard.

  2. Have Quality Time Together
    These days, it can be so tempting to connect with our partners through digital means, such as text messages or Facebook conversations. While it may be convenient, real connection is best accomplished through quality time together in-person. It’s important to be fully present with each other and invest in real conversations that don’t revolve around the kids.

  3. Practice Kindness and Appreciation
    If couples want to strengthen their relationship after having kids, it’s important to practice kindness and appreciation. Put your phones away and show your partner your appreciation by doing things like thanking them for their help with the house or listening to them share about their day. Similarly, be mindful of how you communicate with your partner. Your partner is your number one supporter and you should treat them with respect, kindness, and love.

  4. Get Physical
    Aside from verbal communication, it can be beneficial to strengthen the bond with your partner through physical touch. Practices like cuddling, holding hands, and giving one another massages can help increase oxytocin in your body and can lead to a more positive bond with your partner.

  5. Show Acts of Love
    To reconnect with your partner after having kids, it can be helpful to show acts of love. Doing something kind and thoughtful for your partner, without having them ask, can demonstrate your affection and respect and can be incredibly meaningful. For example, running your partner a bubble bath or giving them a back rub are just some of the ideas that can really make a difference in your relationship.

  6. Take Time for Self-Care
    Finally, it’s important to make sure to take some time for yourself. Self-care allows you to take a break from your daily routine and dedicate some time to yourself; this can help recharge your batteries and can lead to increased connection with your partner in the long run.

It’s true that having kids can bring along a great set of challenges, but by committing to reconnecting and strengthening your relationship, you can feel confident that you and your partner can overcome any obstacle. Though it can be tricky to find the time and energy, putting in the effort is worth it when it comes to sustaining your bond. The tips outlined in this article can help you get started so that you can create an environment of love and security for you and your family.

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